dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
3pm strippers are depressing
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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