Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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