Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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