How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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