yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize