She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
