WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
i believe in u and ur pee
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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