The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
