Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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