I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
