we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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