don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
