He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
