we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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