the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
