Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
