she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Houston, we have a squirter
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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