Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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