Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
