he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I am full of burrito and curiosity
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
