Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
