um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize