carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Sext me about skeletons
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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