My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Randomize
