We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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