Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
