all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
