I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Panties = found
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