What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You dont lie about slip and slides
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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