we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
