Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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