Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize