Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
