it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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