there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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