1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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