and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
