Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize