White coat. Heels.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
My vagina is very pro this idea
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
