I think i peed on brittanys purse
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
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