apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
