I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
