He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Just invented taco cereal.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Randomize
