I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
