Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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