i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize