I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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