Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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