I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize