i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
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