In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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